Remember back in 2011 when Taco Bell, GM and other advertisers pulled their ads from MTV's watered-down port of the British hit Skins? News flash: it wasn't because execs were offended or had moral objections to the show itself. It had nothing to do with public outcry. It was a marketing tactic in itself, a clever way of getting more advertising bang for the buck, and possibly getting some of those bucks back.
An advertiser's moral compass. By Agnico-Eagle, via Wikimedia Commons
The concept is simple. You attach some ads to something you know will be controversial, perhaps a show like Skins or All-American Muslim (wonder how many advertisers "pulled out" of that show in a post-9/11 America? 64). You put money into the ads, but then you pull them because of some moral or patriotic outrage. The media buzz generated by the "pull-out" gets you spots on all the major news channels for free. The story of your taking the moral high ground is strewn across the internet, liked and shared on Facebook, tweeted and retweeted in the Twiterverse, and subject to choppily written, pat-on-the-back posts in the blogosphere. And you may get some of that original investment back from the networks for being "forced" to pull your ads.
We're sure the GM execs who greenlit ads for MTV's Skins had no idea the show was about teenage sex and drug use. It's not like the show had been on in England for four years. And we'll bet those 64 advertisers who pulled out of All-American Muslim had no idea what that show would be about. They must have been sure it would be a hit. American TV-watchers just love Muslims, especially when they steal our words and tack them on themselves. American Muslim? No such thing. (All joking aside, there was at least some media backlash in that case. Cries of racism and nationalism rang out on the internet, and for good reason.)
Boycotts are fun!
So to the people riding high horses and charging for boycotts and federal investigations on moral grounds, jump off the saddle and ask yourself if the corporations who pull their ads really support your cause. Or do they want you sharing their story with your knitting circle on Facebook? Real life isn't like The Grinch. The heartless can't just grow hearts.
Inside the 2011 Analyst Desktop Binder are 374 words the Department of Homeland Security uses to monitor "possible terrorist activity". These are our ten favorites, but if you want to read them all, they're under section 2.13 of the document we have embedded at the end of this post.
10. Exercise. Just another reason to keep "getting fit" off this year's list of resolutions.
9. Recovery. Having problems with your hard drive? Don't worry about getting the data off it. Just buy a new one.
8. Initiative. Trust us, it's better to be a lazy slob than get your act together and end up on a watch list at the same time.
7. Police. Interested in joining the force? Better head to the library with a fake ID if you want to read up on it.
6. Gangs. To the old lady concerned about the graffiti a couple blocks down, eh, you probably don't have a computer anyway.
5. Burn. Aloe vera is what you want. No need to Google it.
4. Outbreak. NO DUSTIN HOFFMAN MOVIES!
3. Pork. It may be the other white meat, but it's off limits round these parts.
2. San Diego. It's supposed to be one of the most beautiful cities in the US, but no, you cannot move there.
1. Smart. This is the one thing the US Government DOES NOT want you to be, so keep being a deaf, dumb, blind little sheep (not really).
There are plenty of places to find sensationalized reports and emotional interviews regarding the COnnecticut shooting. We wanted to avoid talking about it altogether, but as we looked into it, many things seemed too strange to not talk about. If you want personal interest stories or images of of the scene, you'll have to look elsewhere. We hope everyone involved can find peace in this trying time.
MEDICATION LINK
It's long been known medication can cause mood changes, suicidal thoughts and violent outbursts. SSRI Stories provides a list of violent incidents involving people on medications.
The following is a selection of e-mails we've received from a fellow conspiracy theorist and concerned patriot. While they are at times hard to read, they provide shocking foresight and insight into some of the United States' biggest problems. These e-mails have not been edited in any way, though some identifying information has been redacted. Send us an e-mail.
5/12/11 - "30 years ago"
Henry Kissinger meet with the communist leader and saw dirt roads, 1 story sacks, no cars at all, warren people every where. China was concern with Russia coming closer so they thought that Russia would back down if they became friendly with the US. How any one could have thought that the best corporations would move there manufacturing and give there trade secretes away to the communist would have been committed and locked up!
Russia got trapped by Afghanistan and now we are trapped there. Could we become like Russia and China will take over the world?
Most of us would be around to find out, but about half of the 14 Trillion we owe belongs to China. 10,000 workers retire every day here. What's your best guess how this country will do in 30 years?
By FutureofUSChinaTrade.com, via Wikimedia Commons
1/26/12 - (No Subject)
Back in the late 1700s every too stones for granted. In 1793 William Smith, a canal digger, noticed rocks were arranged in layers. There were fossils in different layers. These same size fossils were in other out coppings. Certain size fossils were easier to dig. He draw a map of soft rocks and hard rocks and the church placed him in prison. Hell was a hallow fiery place not various kinds of rocks. Then one day 10 years later, a new nobleman figured that Smith's findings proved scientifically that Noah's flood caused layered rocks with fossils and the church's view of the world was right. William Smith was made the father of Geology.
I'm trying to tell the appealant court that there was a coolant leak in my truck as soon as I got it back from . This is about as hard as William Smith tried to do. If I can't do this by Fed.1 I will have failed.
William Smith. By Hugues Fourau, via Wikimedia Commons
7/27/12 - (No Subject)
If you have a learning difficulty no problem take Adderall! 5% of student are on adderall and some sell it to there friends who take it before tests. The ones who don't get foodstamps. 2 million more food stamp user in the last 2 years.
Brace yourselves for the biggest conspiracy you've ever heard. So big, it affects everyone on earth. So huge, it could affect everyone and everything in the entire known universe and beyond. It's like one of those trick questions atheists ask about god. "Could God make a conspiracy so big even He couldn't believe it?"
The answer is, Yes, He could.
WHAT IS GOD?
In any religion with a God figure, He is thought to be the creator of all life, the architect of the entire universe and the loving deity who placed us here on Earth. The only way we know this, though, is through holy scriptures such as the Bible, the Quran, the Tanakh, or others. And these we received from a prophet, in some teachings from His Son, in others from a chosen mortal. But how do we know we can trust this word?
What if the prophet was misleading us, telling us tales to get something of ours in return? What if he were an intergalactic con artist? He went among the people and performed miracles to gain their trust and adoration. Perhaps these tricks were possible because of advanced technology he had or because he was an inter-dimensional being. It wouldn't be hard to fool ancient goat herders and sand kickers. Perhaps a time traveler called himself God and used technologies we have even today to fool the simple people.
Many religions, such as the Hopi tribe, worship creatures from the sky. An ancient astronaut could have easily fooled cultures before ours, and could probably still fool today's society. In fact, if you look towards the future outcomes of our current society, what do you see? We will eventually master space travel. We will eventually find other life. So, what will we do when we get there? What will we do the 20th, 50th time we find a new planet with sentient creatures? How long will it take for our achievements to go to our heads? For us to get bored with colonization? Look at the colonists who conquered the Americas. Cortez was treated like royalty, and he bathed in adoration, sucking at the power until he finally grew weary and destroyed his worshipers. How long will it take for human nature to run its course?
WHAT DOES GOD WANT?
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment." - Matthew 22:37-40
The first commandment Christians are ever taught is not to trust any other gods, not to worship any others besides the One True God. Why does He need our constant adoration and affection? He requires us to focus our energy and our minds on Him, to send prayers and worship to Him. As an inter-dimensional beast, there is no doubt He is harvesting energy from humans.
"The Human Energy Field". By Jon Whale, via Wikimedia Commons
The human body is a chemical and electrical system. Through us flow powerful currents of energy, and through meditation we can learn to control that energy. Through prayer, we can send that energy to another person or place. God is collecting our prayers as electrical, transcendental energy. He is growing His own energy and becoming more powerful with every prayer.
"Exalt the LORD our God; worship at his footstool! Holy is He!" - Psalms 99:5
"Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised He also is to be feared above all gods." - 1 Chronicles 16:25
These quotes hearken to the god creature's thirst for power. He wants to rule us. He wants us to kneel at His feet and fear Him. He wants us to capitalize pronouns that we use in place of His name. We are taught to fear our God from the moment we're born. And we are taught to worship Him.
WHERE IS GOD NOW?
You may be asking why Jesus left. An entire planet of human slaves and worshipers wounds pretty enticing, but how about an entire universe of worshipers? How about an entire multiverse of devoted followers? The God we know is travelling the universe, searching for life so he can harvest its spiritual energy. Perhaps in the afterlife we will find out what all that prayer has done for us. Has it earned us a spot in Hearven? Or has it made our souls frail by draining our spiritual energy?
The next time you lay yourself down to sleep, ask yourself what you're praying to. And what you're praying for.
When we were in school, our teachers told us "The Riddle of the Sphinx":
What goes on four legs in the morning, on two legs at noon, and on three legs in the evening?
Several of us at Conspiracy Fury were told the story and the riddle. Discovery has an online game about it. As far as we know, young kids are still being exposed to this riddle, but what else are they being exposed to?
The Sphinx is still a great mystery. Versions of this creature are found across the globe in Athens, Delphi, Spain, and more. The pyramids of Egypt are also reflected in South America, leading many to believe the gift of architecture came from one source. We aren't going to go into the whole "aliens helped build the pyramids" argument, though (we do recommend clicking that link).
We just wanted to point this story out because it seems so unlike public education to openly accept and spread this concept. They are inadvertently opening children's eyes to the possibility of a giant, alien, riddle-telling creature. They are sparking an interest in Egypt and the pyramids that could potentially lead to more Conspiracy Fury readers.
Images provided by yohey1028 and Koppchen, via Wikimedia Commons
This isn't a conspiracy. It's a reminder that public education isn't all bad if it's taken the right way. We hope the Riddle of the Sphinx gets kids looking into what the Sphinx really is, and what's going on in Giza, Gaza and the Holy Land.
"Man" is the answer to the Sphinx's riddle, by the way. Perhaps this alien god was laughing at the weak humans.
One thing we all know is that Google loves to make tongue-in-cheek logos. They have thousands of different logos that display in different localities on different days, from Tesla's birthday to Kwanza and more. Here's Google's "Doodle Archive".
It got us thinking, what other kinds of messages are they sending with their logos? Have you ever looked at the logo for Google Chrome? It looks like a giant eyeball, staring right at you. It's watching your every move. It's peering into your browsing habits and down into your soul. Why would they make Chrome's logo a terrifying robot eyeball?
Image copyright Google, Inc. Used here under fair comment and criticism usage.
We started looking into the news, and while there have always been privacy concerns about Google, there seem to be more and scarier stories popping up lately.
I recently helped someone create a Gmail account, and we were both shocked when we saw one of the agreements at the bottom that was already checked. It said, "Google may use my account information to personalize +1's on content and ads on non-Google websites". It was a frightening concept, and it was Google's default choice for us. It makes us wonder how safe Chrome really is.
What browser are you using to view this page? Vote in our poll at the top right.
Breeze over to Talkweb to see how one man purchased the personal data of of 1 million Facebook users for a mere $5. CLICK.
Facebook is a terrifying invention (of the CIA). Stalkers use it to follow their prey. Hackers use it to gather info on victims. Police use it to hunt down suspects. Sometimes Facebook just gives the info to them. Rest assured, they only use the data for good.
Internet security is as simple as A B 1 2 3 4 5 6 C!
Ever notice how Facebook asks you to tag people in photos, and it always knows who the person is? When your face if put on Facebook--even once--you are logged and tracked forever. Better hope were never ruled by a dictator. Even if you aren't on Facebook, but you get caught in a photo with a friend who has it, you're linked to them, and easily trackable.
And if Facebook's public facial recognition software is that good, imagine what the government has. Imagine the amount of data they've collected, through Facebook and beyond it, on everyone, from real threats to harmless sheep to the peace-loving, paranoid darknetters.
President of the United States of America. The most powerful person on earth. Ruler of the biggest, bestestest country ever invented. The "Leader of the Free World"™. The Man.
Not really.
Freakonomics did an eye-opening piece about how much power the POTUS really has, and revealed there really isn't much he can do. He's literally a mascot for America, a figurehead that represents this country, and not much more. Even the most powerful tool he has, the veto, can be overturned by Congress! So, when you go out and vote, you're really just choosing between a big foam elephant costume or a shiny, satin donkey costume for an out-of-work theater manager to wear while he dances around between plays at high school football games.
You're not picking someone who writes and passes laws or balances a budget or runs governmental agencies like the FDA, DEA, CDC, etc. Congress and the House do all that (or act like they do). They make the laws and they vote on them. They--and their corporate, lobbyist leaders--run this country.
Your presidential vote gives you in the dream. It gives you the illusion of freedom, distracting you from the real players in the game. It's the meatloaf your wife gives you to keep you happy while really she's hooking up with all your friends. It keeps your eyes this way while the rats tear into your back.
There's not much more to say. Your vote is a lie. There's no point. It's a broken system meant to trick you into choosing between two helpless pawns. We want to leave you with something uplifting, the music video for Killer Mike's song "Reagan". Enjoy.
The second part of our "RIGHT TO VOTE? WRONG" series continues on the heels of the vice presidential debate. If you didn't watch with glee and rapture, here's a link. We obviously aren't voting, but if we had to choose, we'd choose Joe Biden for president 2012. He gets a bad rap from The Media, but he's one of the most entertaining politicians in the mainstream (and one of the poorest politicians out there). The following clip showcases his off-beat humor that The Media, and most of America, just doesn't get.
Classic Biden!
Moving on to the real issues, if you're still not convinced after Part 1, here's possibly the biggest reason not to vote:
VOTING LEGITIMIZES AN ILLEGITIMATE SYSTEM.
The voting system, as we've pointed out, is a sham, but roughly half the country goes out and votes in every presidential election. Worldwide, that's a low number, but it's still way too high. When half of the eligible voters in the United States go out and vote, they're telling each other, and their masters, that they support the system. The system works. The system is good. Two choices, an electoral college, hackable machines, media and financial taint, and all the other grimes aspects of the voting system are A-OK.
People do this all the time. It's called boycotting. When Chik-fil-A declared their hatred for homosexuals, people who support freedom boycotted the chicken joint. When TV pundits like Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck go too far, people quit buying their garbage and watching their shows. When companies are found to use slave and child labor, consumers boycott their brands. It's a simple concept. You stop supporting things you don't support.
G. Dub has better things to do.
If you go out and vote this November, you're saying, "Yes, this is a good system, and I support it." If enough people vote, we will continue using this broken, shattered system. Your vote doesn't matter, but your non-vote does. Don't vote. Don't support this system. Support freedom. Stay home. Spend your time doing something important. In the next part we'll explain why your vote truly DOES NOT MATTER.
When we dream, our pineal gland releases dimethyltriptamine (DMT), the most powerful, most illegal hallucinogen known to man. It is a chemical with amazing spiritual properties. What has fascinated us most is that everyone who experiences DMT experiences the same thing. They meet the same beings, visit the same places and come back with the same feeling of enlightenment. It isn't like other drugs where our physical reality influences the trip. It is a vehicle that takes you to a spiritual realm beyond our physical world.
This is your brain on dreams. By L.Brown (Own work), via Wikimedia Commons
No, this is a post about doing drugs. We just want to provide a foundation for the spiritual reality explored in dreams. It's a question that has plagued man since his birth into the galaxy. What are dreams and why do we have them? They've been seen as gateways to our pasts and futures, messages from our subconscious, electrical processes our brain uses to form memories and more. Mankind has never truly understood dreams, but rest assured, we have the answer.
String theory, in a nutshell.
By MissMJ, derivative work:
Mateuszica, via Wikimedia Commons
String theory proposes the concept of a multiverse, the idea that there is not merely one universe, but a collection of universes existing together. Our universe exists in harmony with an infinite number of other universes. There are universes where we exist, though with slight differences; universes where we are totally different; universes without us altogether; universes that are devoid of any life; and on and on to infinity.
When we dream, our physical mind merges with the physical minds of our other existences that inhabit in the dimensions that surround us. Our brain stitches together the realities that are simultaneously experienced by our spiritual self. Yes, there is a spiritual "us", but not in the sense of a soul. There is one unified entity, that amalgamates all the moments experienced by the separate physical versions of ourselves.
The reason dreams seem strange to us is because we are experiencing a reality vastly different from our own, where another physical version of our spiritual self dwells. Our physical mind struggles to make sense of it all, and often our dreams are muddled and disjointed, but to be fair, our brain does a good job compiling this information considering how divergent and off-putting these other realities can be. Life in Hell. Worlds without gravity. Planets and creatures different from anything seen on Earth. The multiverse houses an infinite number of creations, and our simple brain is forced to witness, decode and categorize all of them.
EEG readings of the brain
by ULTRA NECTON, via Wikimedia Commons
As much as this theory explains about the meaning of dreams, it raises more questions. Why are our physical selves allowed these glimpses into each others' lives? Why do dreams fade away as the day goes on and we sink back into our own reality. What is our spiritual self's purpose, reason and end game, and will the physical version of ourself experiencing this reality be able to merge with our spiritual self?
It is a complex and deeply philosophical concept, and the answers are still unclear. Perhaps by becoming more connected to our spiritual self we will find the answers, or perhaps only through death are they discovered. Whatever the case, expect more thoughts on the true meaning of dreams in future Conspiracy Fury articles. We apologize for the brevity of this article, given the expansive nature of our topic, but we simply had to get these ideas written down. They came to us in a dream last night.
The US presidential election is coming up in a few weeks or something (we really don't care enough to know the date), and according to The Media, it's going to be a huge (or)deal. The election to end all elections. The Big Kahuna. All the other ones were funny one-liners leading up to this joke, and it'll have you in stitches.
We don't know what this means, but it came up in our search. By James S. Baillie, via Wikimedia Commons.
We decided to take you through a few of the reasons why voting is one of the dumbest things you can do this polling season in this three-part series: "RIGHT TO VOTE? WRONG".
PART 1: A SYSTEM IN SHAMBLES
In case you hadn't noticed, the US voting system is a joke. It's broken in so many ways, it was hard to know where to start this article. There's the awfully conceived electoral college. Oh, and the security problems with the voting machines themselves. Of course, there's also The Media's evil hand in things. But at the base of it all is arguably the biggest problem: the two-party system.
Fill in the blank. By Tomwsulcer , via Wikimedia Commons.
Freedom of choice is not a freedom granted to Americans. You can speak your mind (ha ha), assemble and protest (lol), have wheelchair accessibility (XD), and vote for your leaders, but you can only choose between these two. The red one or the blue one. Republican or Democrat. You have to shape your views to fit with one of these parties. There are other political parties, but they don't get to hold office. It's true. There are currently two Independents in Congress, and zero in the House. Everyone else is Red or Blue. So pick a party (of the two) and get fired up for politics!
One of the reasons this atrocious two-party system is still in place is because of The Media. They polarize everything. They make every argument two-sided, and for most of the mindless masses, that's fine. It's black or white. Republican or Democrat. There is no grey area portrayed between the two, so there is no grey area between the two.
Say you reconciled with the fact that you can only choose between two people. You go out to vote and your vote counts. Everyone votes, and the guy with the most votes wins. Democracy, right? Wrong. We have a representative democracy. People who represent us do the real voting in the electoral college. Learn how it works in more detail here, but basically, we peons vote. People look at those figures and cast votes to represent the majority's wishes. Each state has as many votes as it has members of Congress and the House. So, California gets 53 votes, Ohio gets 20, Montana gets 3, and on and on. This is how states like Florida can decide entire elections. All those old people (who are deeply concerned about future generations) stand in the way of one member of the two-party system getting the 270 votes needed to become POTUS. The rest of the states almost always give their votes to the same party, year after year after year.
If those idiotic problems weren't enough, there's the actual voting process itself: the physical process of voting. Ever heard of hanging chads? The culprit of a botched election in 2000. Just one problem among many, though. Did you know just about anyone can hack a voting machine? Fox News told us that years ago! And, no, they haven't fixed the problem. Rigging an election in the US is about as easy as buying two pounds of fried meat at a drive-through.
Feel free to dig deeper into these issues for yourself, but we're getting depressed. The bottom line is NO, your vote does not count. The system is a mess. You'd have better luck getting your candidate elected in Athens, circa 500 BC. The way political parties in the US works is biased and anti-freedom-of-choice. How those parties are portrayed by The Media is even worse. And to top it off, the system itself is in shambles. If your vote gets through, and isn't diluted by thousands of fake votes, it is only used as a suggestion for a representative in a ridiculous electoral process that takes entire college courses to explain in full.
We know, it's only part one and things aren't looking too good. Just wait until you see why your vote really doesn't matter in "RIGHT TO VOTE? WRONG, PART 2: LEGITIMIZING AN ILLEGITIMATE SYSTEM".
Several Conspiracy Furists have written asking if we're going to cover the "debate". We wanted to write a short response while it's still going on:
No.
By DonkeyHotey, via Wikimedia Commons.
We will probably expose some conspiratorial facets of the debates later in the series, but for now, we think the conspiracy is pretty evident. There are two men onstage. One is the current (possibly illegitimate) president. The other is the illegitimate republican nominee (the voter fraud perpetrated by the GOP spread deep down to even the smallest US counties).
This is not a debate. It's a TV show. It's a commercial. Coke or Pepsi. Red or Blue. We'll cover a debate that gives more contenders an opportunity to speak, one that represents the myriad voices of American citizens (and the people of the world who have to deal with Mr. US President). Until then, tune in if you want, but be sure to watch with metered skepticism.
For over a year, protesters of the "Occupy" movement have done their best to shift society's perspective of Big Banks, Big Oil, Big Brother, Big everything, but for the most part, these heroes have been vilified and downplayed by the mainstream media. As the old adage goes, actions speak louder than words . . . and cardboard signs, chants and drum circles. Below is our four-point plan for helping overhaul the economy, the environment and our society as a whole. If enough people take part in our movement, real change will be possible. If .01% of the world stood up, we'd be 6 million strong. So, here's what to do, my 5,999,999 friends.
STEP 1: Quit Your Job.
The Man needs you working the ol' 9 to 5, stuck in a cubicle Monday through Friday, too tired by the weekend to care about anything other than not being in front of a computer. Your wage is worth less now than ever before (the dollar you earn today is worth less by the time you shower for work tomorrow). Your food, transportation and shelter cost more, and are bought with money that is less valuable than any time in history. The "real money" doesn't even get to you, anyway. It goes straight to the top, to your boss, the guy with million-dollar bonuses and half-year vacations. It's supposed to "trickle down" to you as he buys jet skis, private jets and dolphin steak.
Teddy Roosevelt's resignation letter. Craft yours just like it.
Break apart from the system. Free yourself from the chains of tyranny. Our society won't let you fail. We won't let you go hungry and homeless (as long as you're a woman or child and not a Vietnam veteran, then you're on your own). Stop making another man's dollar, and quit your stupid job. STEP 2: Load Up on Loans and Credit
By Cspurrier + David Vignoni , via Wikimedia Commons
Surely you've had plenty of opportunities to extend your credit limit. We've been offered risk-free $10,000 loans multiple times. Plus, there's this thing called a bank. You stock up on card offers and persuade a banker to give you some money, and you could very well grab yourself $40,000 in cash (debt).
With the financial crisis in full swing, there are a few things to keep in mind. 1. Bill collectors have bigger fish to fry. A few grand is nothing compared with $16 trillion. 2. The government forgives loan defaulters. Why not get imaginary money, spend it, say you're not paying, and get bailed out by Uncle Sam?
Borrow as much credit and money as you can. Not only will your loan and credit help destabilize the economy, it will also help you in the next step!
STEP 3: Buy All the Oil
Use your new-found fortune to do something good for the environment. Lobbyists and regulators have kept natural gas, hydro, nuclear, wind, and solar energy at bay for years (plus there's the martyred hemp industry). Only recently have these alternative resources gained on Big Oil, and who knows what other resources and technologies have been charred off the map. If they don't want to find a new energy source, then let's get rid of the one they have. Maybe when we own all the oil, they'll start working on some truly clean energy (as if they don't already have it). Get out there, and buy that oil, soldier!
Such an eyesore. Photo by “John Womack (littlejohn)”.
STEP 4: Watch it Burn
Now that you have your gas, oil, plastics, and other oil bi-products, it's time for the home run. First, a word of caution: be sure to wear protective clothing, gloves and respirators as these products are known to cause cancer and birth defects.
You can horde your oil and use it against Big Oil later if you want, but when the rest runs out be prepared for gun-wielding hillbillies to come after ya. Our suggestion? Burn it all, so it's gone forever. The choice is yours, but it's obvious we have to act now to save the planet. Without oil, we can finally focus on cleaner, more reliable, sustainable energies. It's obvious money doesn't matter to these ancient corporations. They just crave the power. Give them your money, but take the power. It's the best deal you'll find on the market today.
Imagine all the oil these protesters could buy if they all had loans! Photo by Infrogmation of New Orleans.
It's a wild world we live in, and it's getting scarier by the day. Follow our plan, and you can do more than an entire street-full of protesters. Quit your job. Borrow money. Buy their oil. Watch it burn.
More Fury!What if everything you thought you knew about oil was a lie? We're going to go in-depth into the true oil lie, but until then, here's some information, and it's free.
Every bite you take of those halfway tasty, stale-even-though-it's-before-the-use-by-date Great Value graham crackers, an angel dies. Every piece of fabric attempted to be softened by the Walmart brand softener, an angel. And those uncomfortable steps in shoes that don't seem to conform to human feet? Yeah, another angel.
We just felt like reminding everyone that while Great Value seems like a, well, great value, it's not. It's owned and controlled by Walmart, and to keep it a "great value", they resort to unethical practices. They import most of their products from China and use their stance as the World's Greatest Seller to force companies to sell things for less, often at a loss for the maker. They use the fruits and vegetables from the bottom of the pile to keep their food cheap. They do whatever it takes to keep the price down so the value seems great.
Cheap, but how long will they last? By Derek Bridges from New Orleans, USA.
It may be cheap, but it's bad for the world economy. It's bad for small businesses. It's bad for food growers and product manufacturers. It's bad for your health. It's bad for everyone except the huge money makers at the top of the Walmart pyramid.
On the bright side, people seem to be waking up. Walmart redesigned their entire Great Value brand in 2009, and while it looks cleaner and nicer, sales went down. People stopped biting. It may seem like a deal saving 22 cents on a can of beans, but who is paying for that 22 cents? That savings comes from somewhere. And isn't it worth it to spend your money on food that tastes how it should, pants that fit well, and products that do their job?
Walmart is making a mockery of the word "value" and we want to remind people of that. Forget about saving a few bucks on groceries and adding value to your checkbook. Add value to the world by voting with your dollar. Vote for a better future.
Sometimes it's hard to talk about the truly devious machinations of the shadowy elite, and often we regret giving awful things more publicity, but trust us, there is a conspiracy at work here. If you haven't seen it yet, below is a promo for Here Comes Honey Boo Boo on THE LEARNING CHANNEL.
We'll give you a second to wipe the vomit from your screen. Yes, this is a real show on TLC about the depraved ramblings of a fat, rambunctious, exploited young girl and the people she calls a family. How people watch entire episodes of this we'll never know. Why it's on The Learning Channel, we'll also never know. What we do know is that this is a ploy by the New World Order to shift society's perception of the uneducated, hyperactive, obese members of society, aka the Fat Class.
The NWO have slowly been turning our entire society into the Fat Class. Grocery stores are littered with enriched, hydrogenated, adulterated sweets, syrups and solids. Sugar consumption has exploded over the past 200 years. Trans fats, which are known to increase aggression as well has destroy our bodies, are packed into our pantries (for an interesting read, see how the United Soy Board has tries to spin them). On the other hand, the ability to purchase and consume raw, organic foods is still limited and expensive. So, what does that mean?
By Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Fat people aren't healthy. The Fat Class is less fit than the Elite. They run slower, breathe harder and die sooner.
Fat people are easier to control. They're bulked up just like chickens and cows, and their limited mobility makes them easy targets for the Elite's goons.
Fat people aren't as smart.Research suggests the obese aren't as intelligent as the common man. This makes them easier to control and easier to please. They aren't seeking greater freedom or a metaphysical awareness; they're pleased with a jumbo Coke and 2 lbs. of seared animal flesh.
Over the past 30 years, obesity rates have skyrocketed in America and around the world. Read some CDC information on the subject. The NWO have been increasing the amount of people who are easily controlled puppets, but the problem is people are noticing. We've finally opened our eyes and seen the grease stains on the wall. People are getting fatter, and it's not good for any of us. From higher taxes and insurance premiums to a larger carbon footprint to an increase in the slaughtering of innocent animals to satiate everyone, obesity is in no one's best interest.
Picture of an Obese Teenager (322lbs) with Central Obesity, side view.
And that's where Honey Boo Boo comes in. She puts a cute, innocent (though excessively annoying) face to the fat. She is the new spokesperson of the Fat Class. She's on TV. She's doing it right. She's OK. If she's that fat, and her family's that fat, and they're all leeches on the legs of society, then it's alright for me to be like that, too. I don't have to go to school. I don't have to take care of my body. I can do whatever I want, and the consequence is I'll get a TV show.
This is how it starts. We get fat. We get lazy. We get controlled. The NWO is plumping us up to position us how they want us. They will surpass our capabilities mentally, physically, monetarily, and, soon enough, interdimensionally. There's a reason the education system is broken. There's a reason the FDA hasn't started a War on Obesity (we have a war on everything else, after all). They want us this way. They want all of us this way. Too fat to run and too dumb to care. Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is just one piece of the sugary, cholesteroly pie of control.
Edited image depicting the docile Fat Class watching the Elite's goons overtake our freedoms.
UPDATE 8/31/12: As a little bonus, Nielsen ratings proclaimed Honey Boo Boo the victor in the battle over viewers during the Republican National Convention. In fact, Honey Boo Boo and crew more than doubled the amount of viewers. We're not sure if this is a sign that Mitt Romney doesn't appeal to Americans, or that they would rather stuff their guts with chemical-laced popcorn and watch human pigs at the TV trough. It's bleak no matter how you look at it.
Most of our readers are probably aware that us Conspiracy Furists vehemently support freedom and personal rights. One of our main fears is losing those rights, and many of the actions of the US Government deeply worry us. The Patriot Act, the NDAA, the War on Drugs, and many laws regarding "taboo" social issues like same-sex marriage are just some examples of why we are scared.
What's scarier is that homophobia and hate, racism, class warfare, etc., are all used to drive a wedge between members of society. "Divided we fall; united we stand." It's not to say people aren't persecuted, sometimes violently, for being different, but the media and the powers that be exaggerate these issues to polarize us. They encourage that hatred to keep us under control and to keep themselves off our radar by distracting us.
Interference graphic by Dr. Schorsch via Wikimedia Commons
The Chik-fil-A situation is an example of this tactic. American citizens have far more to worry about than the deranged ramblings of a senile old man who's been in the business of slaughtering and frying bird meat for his entire life. We're in countless wars, our economy is collapsing, jobs are scarce, our prisons are overflowing, our education system is utterly broken, tax money (that's unfairly collected) is being wasted, our Congress exists only to serve their interests and the interests of hugely wealthy corporations, and on and on. And while it's unfortunate that Dan T. Carthy is using his social position to spread a message of hate, he's merely exercising his First Amendment Rights.
The Young Turks on Mr. Carthy's comments. (Note: this video is editorialized.)
We think boycotting Chik-fil-A is a great idea. If you don't support the owner's beliefs, you don't have to eat his greasy meat-sandwiches. But make the decision, and call it good. Don't let it consume your entire being. Don't dwell on it for days at a time and lash out at people who still want to eat his chicken. It's not that important.
While proponents of same-sex marriage are boycotting the chicken joint, opponents of same-sex marriage, in an attempt at restoring order in the universe, have decided to hold "eat-ins" to show support for Chik-fil-A's CEO and his remarks. John Stewart had a delicious commentary about it the other day. That's right. People are flocking en masse to buy fast food in an attempt to undermine the actions of their fellow Americans. In a time of financial instability, health concerns and worldwide turmoil, people are buying fried chicken as a social and political statement to spite other people.
The wedge has spread rapidly through the realm of social media. We saw this image on Facebook today:
When will you stop exploiting the suffering of the oppressed for a cheaply made e-card?
We won't go into the fact that America is supposed to be a shining light of democracy for the world. How at least our government has (for the most part) gotten past executing its own people for their beliefs. How the only way to promote and continue change and bring about a better society is to strive for more social acceptance and comradery. We will say, however, that these petty, user-made e-cards are just a tiny example of how the social wedge continues to grow. People are spreading messages of intolerance and veiled hate (that they most likely don't understand is hate) to make a point in regard to a non-issue.
As to the Bible-pushers(-down-throaters), this must be what people mean when they say they're "doing God's work". They're actually trying to do His job for Him, and we're pretty sure the Bible says He doesn't like that. We don't believe in God, per se, but to everyone who does, please let Him do His job. The evil, marriage-destroying gays will get theirs when they die and meet that giant burning Judge in the sky.
Passing judgement is fun, which is why God saved it for Himself.
And so, the fight rages. One side is supporting people's rights, even though the catalyst for their anger is ridiculous. The other side is brandishing the Word of God in an attempt to control how other people live their lives. And as the e-cards get shared and liked online and the exaggerated news reports flow, the topic continues to move further and further away from the social issue of same-sex rights to the Chik-fil-A non-issue that is stupidly dividing people.
As freedom-lovers, we support everyone's right to ". . . life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." Do what you want, just don't hurt anyone and don't mess with their rights, and don't get caught up in the media's ploys to distract and divide you. For now, we're going to take our own advice and move on with our lives. The Chik-fil-A "issue" is aggravating, but we ALL have bigger chicken to fry.
Would you eat this to support your cause? By Biswarup Ganguly via Wikimedia Commons.
This is what everyone's talking about right now. The landing of NASA's Curiosity rover on Mars. This is the first image back from the rover:
Sorry to be cynical, but we don't think America's "curiosity" drove this $2.5 billion mission forward. Take another look at the image above and imagine anyone you encounter in public being awe-struck by it. We can't wait for the over-sized women in Walmart lines to belch, "That much money for black and white photos of some rocks? Ha! I got them same rocks in the driveway up to my trailer." Sorry to generalize, but seriously.
This is what NASA promised us:
By NASA via Wikimedia Commons.
This looks more like scene out of a Michael Bay movie (Transformers 4?). It's exciting. It's fun. It's something we want to watch. And that's what brings us to our point. We aren't saying that Curiosity didn't land on Mars. We aren't saying the images are fake. We aren't saying those seven minutes of "terror" (aka "silence") weren't legitimate. We're saying, what were they distracting us from?
We're big fans of Richard C. Hoagland's Dark Mission, so we don't trust NASA in the first place. As you've read before, we think know there are crazy things going on with Venus. Our best guess is that Venus is the origin of modern man. What's very interesting is that while all this "curiosity" is happening, Venus is behind us doing who knows what. Here's a map of what we mean:
Click for a larger view.
We'll let you rest somewhat easy tonight, high on "America's victory". (On a side note, wasn't John P. Holdren's speech about America, America and America great? Was this a scientific endeavor or a public relations stunt for Obama? Here's what our Leader had to say by the way.)
Hopefully you viewed tonight's events with a sense of skepticism rather than curiosity. Curiosity killed the cat, after all. Don't let it get to you, too.
This is footage of militarized police in Anaheim, California.
Since 9/11, the US government has been expanding its power. First, came the multi-trillion-dollar-a-year War on Terror. Then, the Department of Homeland Security was created to combat terrorism by stopping online piracy. Next, there was the Patriot Act that expanded the US government's ability to gather information on "terror suspects" (it also expanded the term "terrorism" to include domestic terrorists, aka US citizens). In 2011, President Barack Obama extended the most frightening aspects of the Patriot Act, and, in the same year, became the first US President to kill an American citizen without due process. In 2012, President Obama created the nightmarish National Defense Authorization Act, a frothing, tentacled creature born of Phillip K Dick's paranoid hallucinations and Joseph Stalin's Manual for Running Your Country*.
July 21, 2012 - Police approach 25-year-old Manuel Diaz. He runs, so they shoot and kill him. Witnesses in the area begin questioning the police for murdering an unarmed man. Tensions rise, and in the end, officers disperse the crowd with shotguns loaded with bean bags, tasers and a wild K-9 looking for a snack. When the dust settles, police officers attempted to purchase witnesses' cell phones and cameras to hide video evidence of the event.
July 22, 2012 - The day after murdering an unarmed Latino, police kill another, even younger, Latino named Joel Acevedo. Reports say he fired at police, though that is still "under investigation." This second killing sparked more protests, and in the following days, protests grew, drawing larger numbers of police responders. For the most part, protests have seemed peaceful and restrained given the circumstances. But as they continue, more and more militarized police are entering Anaheim, prepared to follow orders, orders that hopefully include "protect and serve".
*This is not really a book by Stalin, though he does have several that Obama probably reads before bed.
The chemtrails have been in full force lately. The other day I was blown away by how much seeding was going on. Unfortunately, I didn't have a nice camera with me--just my phone--and by the time I got to a camera most of the chemtrails had spread out into huge blanket clouds.
You'll have to take my word for it because I only had my phone, but this is a black chemtrail.
Little X's filled the sky.
Wider shot of the X's and crosshatching.
Four-line star.
There are a lot of theories on chemtrails. One that I've been mulling over lately is that the ozone layer has become so depleted they're doing their best to either re-establish it or keep us from frying alive while they can. My thoughts on that theory are A) I hope it works and they can hold the Sun's deadly rays off for a while, B) I hope the chemicals aren't dangerous (probably are) and C) why aren't they telling us anything about this?
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